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          "body": "No one else is saying it so I am. SHES SO FUCKING CUTE I WANT HER",
          "created_at": "2026-04-03T04:07:37.844-04:00",
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          "created_at": "2026-03-23T20:14:29.258-04:00",
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          "body": "Tuff choice right here",
          "created_at": "2026-03-23T03:27:44.503-04:00",
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          "body": "Mmmm... bagel🤤",
          "created_at": "2026-03-17T19:19:13.254-04:00",
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          "creator_name": "Zorium",
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          "body": "[quote]\"followthedamntrain\":/users/2449045 said:\nnaming urself harrod with an artie pfp is straight evil \n[/quote]\n\nIT WAS A TYPO",
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          "creator_name": "ArtieHoward",
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          "body": "[quote]\"bebav\":/users/707870 said:\nJe vais te toucher la nuit \n[/quote]\n\n[i]avala nerveusement[/i]",
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          "creator_name": "followthedamntrain",
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          "body": "[quote]\"followthedamntrain\":/users/2449045 said:\n[b]LA CRÉATURE[/b]\n[/quote]\n\nJe vais te toucher la nuit ",
          "created_at": "2026-03-11T10:22:28.066-04:00",
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          "creator_name": "Bebav",
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          "body": "untoasted bagel definitely",
          "created_at": "2026-03-08T05:39:24.549-04:00",
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        {
          "body": "Why not both?",
          "created_at": "2026-03-04T00:04:59.509-05:00",
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          "body": "[quote]\"normal_editz\":/users/2419511 said:\nIs no one fucking the axolotl\n[/quote]\n\nits me",
          "created_at": "2026-02-22T22:50:44.375-05:00",
          "creator_id": 2449045,
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          "body": "[quote]\"bunnybutcher666\":/users/2474772 said:\nThe both of them have holes, so either or is fine by me.\n[/quote]\n\nyoure willing to fuck a bagel?",
          "created_at": "2026-02-20T23:53:08.101-05:00",
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          "body": "[quote]\"imbadatnamingthings\":/users/473165 said:\nI'm fucking the axolotl\n\nShe'd probably say cute romantic things in french that I wouldn't understand but I'd appreciate the sentiment anyway\n[/quote]\n\nHoly based pfp ",
          "created_at": "2026-02-19T02:29:02.538-05:00",
          "creator_id": 2538227,
          "creator_name": "SardFnuffer",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
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          "updater_id": 2538227,
          "updater_name": "SardFnuffer",
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          "body": "[quote]\"normal_editz\":/users/2419511 said:\nIs no one fucking the axolotl\n[/quote]\n\nI'm fucking the axolotl\n\nShe'd probably say cute romantic things in french that I wouldn't understand but I'd appreciate the sentiment anyway",
          "created_at": "2026-02-17T21:00:48.201-05:00",
          "creator_id": 473165,
          "creator_name": "Imbadatnamingthings",
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          "score": 2,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-17T21:00:48.201-05:00",
          "updater_id": 473165,
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        {
          "body": "[b]LA CRÉATURE[/b]",
          "created_at": "2026-02-17T19:15:40.444-05:00",
          "creator_id": 2449045,
          "creator_name": "followthedamntrain",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
          "id": 9645606,
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          "score": 3,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-17T19:15:56.004-05:00",
          "updater_id": 2449045,
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          "body": "[quote]\"normal_editz\":/users/2419511 said:\nIs no one fucking the axolotl\n[/quote]\n\nI would but only after a date to bagel world I need like two more on my punch card\n",
          "created_at": "2026-02-13T11:25:18.958-05:00",
          "creator_id": 1220444,
          "creator_name": "SethLupine",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
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          "score": 0,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-13T11:25:18.958-05:00",
          "updater_id": 1220444,
          "updater_name": "SethLupine",
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        {
          "body": "Is no one fucking the axolotl",
          "created_at": "2026-02-13T09:54:07.871-05:00",
          "creator_id": 2419511,
          "creator_name": "Normal_Editz",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
          "id": 9635407,
          "is_hidden": false,
          "is_sticky": false,
          "post_id": 6181872,
          "score": 5,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-13T09:54:07.871-05:00",
          "updater_id": 2419511,
          "updater_name": "Normal_Editz",
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          "body": "[quote]\"blaze_4_da_lord\":/users/509557 said:\nI don't know, that bagel looks pretty hot...\n[/quote]\nClearly not, as it hasn’t been toasted yet\n",
          "created_at": "2026-02-10T08:25:43.231-05:00",
          "creator_id": 2500552,
          "creator_name": "arandomfoxthing",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
          "id": 9628866,
          "is_hidden": false,
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          "post_id": 6181872,
          "score": 7,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-10T08:25:43.231-05:00",
          "updater_id": 2500552,
          "updater_name": "arandomfoxthing",
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        {
          "body": "Depends",
          "created_at": "2026-02-09T23:19:35.877-05:00",
          "creator_id": 1518586,
          "creator_name": "Goobie_II",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
          "id": 9628123,
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          "score": 1,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-09T23:19:35.877-05:00",
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          "updater_name": "Goobie_II",
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        {
          "body": "I don't know, that bagel looks pretty hot...",
          "created_at": "2026-02-09T22:13:57.951-05:00",
          "creator_id": 509557,
          "creator_name": "Blaze_4_da_Lord",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
          "id": 9627986,
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          "post_id": 6181872,
          "score": 4,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-09T22:13:57.951-05:00",
          "updater_id": 509557,
          "updater_name": "Blaze_4_da_Lord",
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        {
          "body": "Peak",
          "created_at": "2026-02-09T22:11:15.898-05:00",
          "creator_id": 1699254,
          "creator_name": "Ex-convict",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
          "id": 9627977,
          "is_hidden": false,
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          "score": 0,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-09T22:11:15.898-05:00",
          "updater_id": 1699254,
          "updater_name": "Ex-convict",
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        {
          "body": "The both of them have holes, so either or is fine by me.",
          "created_at": "2026-02-09T22:11:05.034-05:00",
          "creator_id": 2474772,
          "creator_name": "user_2474772",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
          "id": 9627975,
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          "score": 7,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-09T22:11:05.034-05:00",
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        {
          "body": "She is so cute I am going to explode",
          "created_at": "2026-02-09T22:07:13.534-05:00",
          "creator_id": 470623,
          "creator_name": "Thine-Dude",
          "do_not_bump_post": false,
          "id": 9627968,
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          "score": 10,
          "updated_at": "2026-02-09T22:07:13.534-05:00",
          "updater_id": 470623,
          "updater_name": "Thine-Dude",
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